Saturday, July 03, 2004

Amnesty considered for insurgents in Iraq 

I wonder how the Marines feel about this plan.

Iraq May Give Amnesty to Insurgents


Death comes in threes 

That's what my ex-mother-in-law used to say. She is a character. Tough old bird from the old school, etc.

When Reagan and Ray Charles died within a day or so of each other, the platitudes were flying. Damn, they STILL have those flags at half-mast. "What'd I Say?" really influenced an entire generation of Boomers, I suppose. That's some tribute.


Still, they say death comes in threes. And when Marlon Brando died today, the platitudes came heavy again. Greatest actor of our generation. A trail-blazer. Difficult private character, but unbelievable power on stage. The Master is gone.

But it struck me a minute ago how ironic it is that the best actor of our generation was preceded into death by less than a month by one of the WORST actors ever. Reagan never sold me on a single performance he ever gave--especially his Presidential ones.

He could afford to be a sunny optimist--he had HIS.


Friday, July 02, 2004

Rock Paper Saddam! 

I'm sitting here with TEARS OF LAUGHTER streaming down my face.

Go and see why.


Thursday, July 01, 2004

Good 'toons 

I saw some hilarious cartoons today at Bartcop.

First, the two guys talking on the phone at work from Get Your War On:

"What were the first words spoken in the newly sovereign Iraq?"

" 'Mr. Bremer! Aren't you staying for the reception?' "

"You know, I'm surprised he didn't take one final leisurely stroll through the lazy summer streets of Baghdad."

"I love it. Nothing says 'Good luck' like handing off sovereignty and running straight to the airport. Do we always treat sovereigny like it's a goddam grenade?"

Then we have Vanna White before the Wheel of Fortune letter board, with the words "GO _UCK YOURSEL_" written out--category, Phrase.

Then there's the bumper sticker I want--

Bush/Cheney '04 (the actual genuine logo) followed by:

Don't Switch Horsemen Mid-Apocalypse


Wednesday, June 30, 2004

The Statistics of "Fahrenheit 9/11" 

According to this writer, F 9/11 ranks in the top five grossing movies of all time--by way of gross per theater.

In other words, F 9/11 packed the movie theaters with more paying customers than any other film except the other five it shared the statistic with. And it did so with far fewer theaters that released the film. In that category, it's the best of all time.

Nice, eh?


NOW I get it! 

This explains it all. Why do WMD enthusiasts refuse to see reality?

Josh Marshall is a genius. Go read the rest of it; it's good, too.

"There's a body of sociological literature which shows that when the world does not come to an end on the day prescribed by this or that messianic cult, the cult usually does not fall apart. Rather, their belief only tends to intensify to still greater levels. Safire seems to be an example of the same phenomenon only applied to Iraqi WMD cult."


Make up your minds, why don'tcha? 

Jordan Rejects Ban on Osama, Saddam Names

AMMAN, Jordan - Jordan's parliament rejected a bill Wednesday that would enable the government to prevent parents from naming their children Osama bin Laden or Saddam Hussein.

By a vote of 50-38, legislators turned down the proposed amendment to the Civic Status Law, which would have empowered registration officers to reject names that they deem "harmful to public order."

"The bill does not implement democracy, and there is no law in the whole world which restricts the freedom of naming newborns," said independent legislator Mohammed Shawabkeh.

An Islamist lawmaker, Mohammed Abu-Faris, said the bill had been proposed "to please the Americans."

Jordan needs to get its act together. Bush has brought freedom to the Middle East. Prohibiting naming your own children after such obvious evil-doers is a big part of that freedom.

If Jordan doesn't get their act together, I promise you...they're next.


They've lost Jesse 

Well, they'll just tell you he's too old to make sense any more. Or something like that. From the Washington Post (scroll down), via atrios:

"I would not have voted for [President Bush's] tax cut, based on what I know. . . . There is no doubt that the people at the top who need a tax break the least will get the most benefit. . . . Too often presidents do things that don't end up helping the people they should be helping, and their staffs won't tell them their actions stink on ice."

-- Former senator Jesse Helms (R-N.C.), in a recent interview with Business North Carolina magazine.

"...stink on ice." Now there's a phrase you don't hear every day, except from people who lived through the Great Depression.


I miss the good old days 

Where'd all the fucking money go? Where's the money?

Reality Intrudes on Promises in Rebuilding of Iraq


More than a year into an aid effort that American officials likened to the Marshall Plan, occupation authorities acknowledge that fewer than 140 of 2,300 promised construction projects are under way. Only three months after L. Paul Bremer III, the American administrator who departed Monday, pledged that 50,000 Iraqis would find jobs at construction sites before the formal transfer of sovereignty, fewer than 20,000 local workers are employed.

I miss the good old days--when the biggest argument was Monica Lewinsky, and how to spend the surplus.

Don't you?


Prices Rose After Medicare Law 

Bush's Medicare law was passed in exactly the same illegal fashion as the buildup to Dubya's Iraq invasion, by WITHHOLDING CRUCIAL INFORMATION and presenting LIES TO CONGRESS. It is one of his administration's biggest crimes, but we only have SO MANY PROSECUTORS TO SPARE to avoid investigating his most criminal administration in U.S. history.

You have to go back to the days of Louis XVII for more open corruption, the days of King John for more outright sinister executive rule, or the days of Caligula to the days of more ridicule for the rule of law.

Some genius has to tell me--why is implementing a law whose end result is HIGHER PRICES FOR DRUGS is...a good thing?

Drug Prices Rose After Medicare Law, Group Says

Remember? AARP bent over BACKWARDS to sell this monstrosity to Congress and its AARP members. Millions of members have expressed their discontent with the organization; thousands have quit, but most have not because they CAN'T AFFORD TO.

Turns out they figured out that the bill of goods they were sold and they DID sell was BOGUS. The entire leadership of AARP should resign in disgrace, but apparently they have no more shame than Bush & CO.

Fellow Three Stooges enthusiasts will recognize this famous name from their shorts: The con man with the pencil-moustache and the pin-stripe suit--

I. Fleecem.

Among the 25 top-selling drugs, Bristol-Myers Squibb Co.'s anti-clotting drug Plavix topped the list with a 7.9 increase, followed by its cholesterol-fighting Pravachol at 7 percent.

Goddammit, I'M on Pravachol!


Congress bows to the Reverend Sun Yung Moon 

Will this event be covered as little and as late as the LAST Moon coronation? Koresh help us...if it weren't so, so, so...constitutionally obscene to everything America has stood for since 1776, this would be HILARIOUS. It is both, I suppose.

"Kingdom of God" to be revealed Wednesday at National Press Club


BACKGROUND: Intense media and public interest has arisen concerning an event held on March 23, 2004 at the Dirksen Senate Office Building in Washington, D.C. Questions and controversies have swirled regarding the purpose of the event, what happened, who attended and why. Were dignitaries "duped" into attending? What about the provocative claims made by Rev. Moon? How did such an event take place on Capitol Hill? Are the charges of anti-semitism, homophobia, etc., true?

In attendance will be a number of rabbis, imams, priests and other religious leaders from the United States, Israel and Palestine, representing the event co-sponsors.

Internally, Moon's preachers have described the press conference as "the day of the revealing of the Kingdom Of God." So they're in a tight spot. Unless they bend the truth, they must play down the holy revelation aspect of the event, without contradicting what they've told their own followers about America's accepting Moon as its king. And to explain why Congressmen weren't "duped," they're under pressure to avoid embarrassing the politicians who want to distance themselves from views I linked to above.

...According to reader Rob, who attended, Rabbi Waldman attended, blew a shofar and was identified as being from Temple Beth Tephilath, apparently in suburban Detroit. And Archbishop Stallings threw a fit following a question about whether he'd taken money or a gold watch from Moon (he had).


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